The Patriarchy-The Legend

Last up in my trio of reviews of Devil’s Right Hand Stouts is The Legend—a barrel aged version of The Elder (that one was sold out when I visited Parsons Brewing Company)—the 10% 45 IBU ale is aged in barrels that once housed Wild Oak Whiskey from Kinsip House of Fine Spirits. Sold in 650mL bombers, this stuff is a recipe for a nap if you drink it on an empty stomach on a sunny Sunday afternoon (this I know from experience).

The Legend is a dark beer with amber highlights. It pours with a think and unyielding tan foam and has a nose that is sweet, woody, and chocolatey. Flavour is sweet, particularly in the early going, with treacle and chocolate elevating a malty opening salvo. The finish is fairly bitter, though a bit more generous hopping might have made for better balance.

Thick and sticky, The Legend is an apparently dour ale with a playful side. It has nice wood aging elements, sweetness that is plentiful without overpowering, and a reasonable bitter finish. It’s strength is great, too. As mentioned earlier, another portion of dank hops might have made this beer a bit more appealing to me, but otherwise, it did a nifty job of holding my attention. After reviewing, I paired the second half of my beer with a maduro cigar, and the result was pleasing.

Rating: 8.5 out of 10.

The Patriarchy-The Father

Like its lower alcohol progeny, the 8.5% alcohol, 45 IBU brew known as The Father comes in wax-capped 650mL bombers. From Parsons Brewing Company in Picton, Prince Edward County, Ontario, this edition of the Devil’s Right Hand Stout series weighs In at a hefty 8.5% alcohol. 

Barrel-aged in bourbon (Woodford Reserve) and rye (Jack Daniels Rye—note to self: investigate JD Rye) casks, The Father has a thick and sticky licorice nose, mellowed with some woody aromatics. The flavour combines cocoa, espresso, licorice, vanilla, and a warm and boozy finish to create a formidable offering. Not too sweet (a regular failing of wood-aged beers)not too bitter, this beer had caramelized brown sugar notes and bitter coffee notes in moderation. 

A black beer nestled under a durable tan head, this beer looks exactly like a stout should, and tastes big: it’s both flavourful and strong. I drank The Father while I waited for a particularly exquisite steak to grill (thanks for taking my money Cumbrae’s—it was more than worth it), and by the time my cow was pink, I was salivating to a grotesque degree. This beer was a huge, indispensable part of the late lunch, and I am richer (actually fatter and poorer) for having enjoyed it. It’s late June, but I’m willing to gamble that this will be the best stout I have in 2018—prove me wrong, world!

Rating: 9.5 out of 10.

The Patriarchy-The Son

The junior, baseline entry in Parsons Brewing Company’s Devil’s Right Hand Stout series is The Son. A 6.2%, 45 IBU ale, The Son comes in 650mL bombers with waxed tops—stylish to look at, but a goddamned ordeal to open. EDITORIAL ASIDE: Breweries either have to stop doing this, provide specialized openers for the task, or include an easy-open tab like latter-day bottles of Maker’s Mark. This style of packaging is always a battle.

Back to the beer. The Son is a near-black ale with amber highlights. It pours with a topographically rich tan head, and features a sweet, chocolatey nose. It has a fairly robust flavour that begins sweetly, but angles toward java bitterness. The mouthfeel is thick and chewy, but the weight isn’t too heavy or sticky.

A good baseline stout for the series, The Son is well-made, but unremarkable, leaving a lot of room to play around with barreling and other modifications. Strength is adequate, nose is enticing, and flavour is engaging, but not quite remarkable on any front. In short, a stout with serious potential.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10.

The Patriarchy

Parsons Brewing Co. has me figured out. They’ve landed on a formula guaranteed to divest me of almost any amount of money south of $50. How? By creating a serious of stouts; all variations on a theme. That theme is the “Devil’s Right Hand Stout”, in three (or more) expressions. The three they nabbed me with are “The Son”, “The Father”, and “The Legend”.

On the downside, Parsons opted to drape their bottles in twine and cardboard placards, rather than providing proper details on the waxed-dipped 650mL bottles themselves. A fine practice if you buy one bottle at a time, or if you don’t spend the next several hours driving on back roads. As a result of some bumpy driving, all three bottles shed their placards, so one of the challenges was identifying which bottle was which based on limited info. Fortunately, I’m the Stout Man, and I’m pretty sure I got it all sorted (aided in no small part by the fact that the cap of “The Legend” wasn’t waxed).

Stay tuned over the next week for my thoughts on this trio of stouts from Prince Edward County, Ontario.

Resistance Dry-Hopped Lager

According to the 355mL can that houses Resistance Dry-Hopped Lager, a portion of the proceeds are “donated to organizations dedicated to fighting oppression worldwide”—a laudable sentiment, though one that would have a bit more significance if it identified what proportion of proceeds and which organizations.

Born in Toronto, Resistance comes from Muddy York Brewing Co. The beer, a 5.2% alcohol, 18 IBU lager, is billed as the baby brother of Gaslight Helles Lager (but in truth, I think this is the superior beer—my own little bro has long maintained that the junior sibling can outstrip the senior,  and here is the first evidence I’ve ever seen to confirm his wacky theory). It has a slightly hazy golden countenance and pours with a thin but durable disc of off-white suds. The brew is dry-hopped with Sorachi Ace hops which doubtlessly contributes to the bitter lemon aroma that permeates the nose. Crisp and pleasant, the beer has a summer-friendly mouthfeel and a flavour to match—grassy blended with a modestly hoppy citrus finish.

I like pale lagers well enough when the context suits (hot day, full sun, sweaty, task recently accomplished or still in progress). However, I’m primarily an ale addict, which makes dry-hopping a likely winner. Resistance has a nice hop component, though I’d have liked it to be kicked up another notch. A percentage just north of the standard five also goes a long way—that 0.2% is worth .5 in my rating. A more assertive front end would have pushed this li’l lager still higher, but alas.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10.

Wonder Star

During a weekend spent cat-sitting my pals Mishi and Moo, I was treated to a fridge full of frosty brews, including a 473mL can of Wonder Star, a “botanical lager” from the wacky team at Flying Monkeys Craft Brewery. This Barrie, Ontario beer was low-test, at just 4.5% alcohol. Unfortunately, there was no ingredients list on the can (which was decked out in a Yellow Submarine-inspired motif), so I’m not certain which botanicals made the cut. However, I can tell you with some certainty that the beer was dull gold in colour, cloudy, and highly carbonated. It poured with a durable centimetre of eggshell head, and had a truly unusual aroma. Seriously, this beer combined scents like citrus fruit, gummy worms, and juniper to form an oddball combo. Unsurprisingly, the flavour also racked up a bunch of diverse elements: grapefruit was the most assertive, but candy and gin weren’t ever far behind.

As Flying Monkeys regularly seems to set out to do, Wonder Star was a unique and hard-to-classify lager. It combined some of the most diverse flavours I’ve ever experienced in a single lager, and the result was (largely) successful. If I were pulling the levers, I’d have upped the juniper and laid off the candy sweetness. For me, a “botanical lager” ought to taste of naturally occurring flavours, and somehow gummy worms don’t feel at home. Still, on a hot day (the humidex was almost 45 C, and Moo and Mish don’t live in an air conditioned home), this quirky little lager was ably refreshing and kept the sweats at bay for a little while. Would I recommend this beer? That’s not an easy one. Yes, I’d recommend it to beer geeks looking for something unusual or to occasional beer-drinkers looking to keep cool. I wouldn’t recommend it to fans of macro lagers in the market for something to keep them cool, or to beer traditionalists.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10.

Gaslight Helles Lager

June is grilling season, and that means pale lagers are in my fridge more than at any other time of the year. On a Wednesday night, I found myself home alone and contemplating BBQing yellow summer squash, a daunting task I’d never before undertaken (turns out it’s easy and tasty as hell. To fortify myself for this culinary endeavour, I reached for a 473mL can of Gaslight Helles Lager, a 5.4% alcohol, 18 IBU brew from Toronto’s Muddy York Brewing Co.

This pale lager was yellow gold, clear, and topped with a cottony white head. It had a fresh, grassy nose, a cracking crisp mouthfeel, and a flavour that encompassed sweet grains and dry hops.

Billed as a Munich-style helles, Gaslight proved to be an uncomplicated and enjoyable beer with a few features that set it ahead of Joe Macro: (1) it has 5.4% alcohol and that extra tick isn’t frivolous; and (2) it doesn’t taste of corn, rice, or other tricky additives—I’d warrant that this German-style lager would comply with the Reinheitsgebot, Germany’s famed purity law of 1516. I’ve had better pale lagers, but if you’re in the mood for a satisfying golden bubbly beer, Gaslight is a fine craft alternative to the widely available macros. It won’t knock your socks off, but it’ll refresh the hell out of you.

Rating: 7.0 out of 10.

Moonless Night

Moonless Night is an oatmeal stout from Toronto’s Eastbound Brewing Co. Wildly sessionable at just 4.4% alcohol, the beer comes in 355mL cans. It’s a black ale infused with amber highlights, and it pours with a nice covering of light tan head.

For a low-alcohol stout, Moonless Night has a remarkably solid aroma. It has smooth scent that features chocolate, coffee, and roasted malt notes. The flavour is a little less pronounced, though it does have some nice notes of latte, and builds to a fairly bitter crescendo. Mostly, though, the highlight of moonless night is its smooth mouthfeel.

Flavourful and sessionable aren’t beer adjectives that often intersect. Moonless Night is an example, though the beer is rich enough that you might not want to have more than one in a session despite the low percentage. The bitterness at the finish adds a nice element of balance, though the beer is still a bit too sweet.

Rating: 7.0 out of 10.

Hula Hoop Sour Rizbal Mango Lassi

Hula Hoop Sour Rizbal Mango Lassi comes from Parsons Brewing Company out of Ontario’s scenic Prince Edward County. Sold in 500mL bottles and clocking in at 4.8% alcohol, the beer is a somewhat milky orange-hued grog with a thin cap of white head.

But enough of preliminaries—let’s get down to the brew. Hula Hoop has a genuinely unique aroma. It’s faintly tart, but really luxuriates in mango purée elements. The flavour owes less to sweet mango than it does to funky yeast, but there is an island fruit undercurrent that lends a little global flair.

This beer does a pretty fair job of recreating the lively yogurt funk that comes from a mango lassi. However, it lacks the creaminess and sweetness that make lassis such a pleasant treat. Still, for a sour beer from Cottage Country, Ontario, this stuff has some cred.

Rating: 7.0 out of 10.

Country Brown Ale

Country Brown Ale is my second foray into the world of Lake on the Mountain Brewing Company. This 5% alcohol, 34 IBU brown ale comes from Prince Edward County, Ontario, and comes in 660mL bombers. The label features a classic red barn and made me pick it from among LotM’s offerings.

Dark brown with ruddy leanings, Country Brown poured with a quickly diminishing yet oddly persistent tan head. Roasted malts and toasted brown bread were the prevalent aromatics. As for the flavour, this nicely balanced number ambles between malt, molasses, and biscuit, with a short burst of dry hops to shut the barn door.

For me, brown ales are often a reliable barometer of a brewer’s skill. Remember, I don’t brew myself, so this may be pure fancy, but to me, a brown ale is easy to make but hard to make well. From a reviewer’s perspective, earning basic points is easy enough, but it’s a tricky style that shows imperfections pretty clearly. Based on the quality of Country Brown, and in the strength of only one other beer, I suspect that the folks at LotM are more than mere hobby brewers. This beer was tasty and balanced, with few knocks against it. Sure, I’d like to see higher integer preceding the %, and a few more IBUs, but the foundation of this ale is better that good—not too sweet, not flimsy, and not tinny. In short, this is a dandy brown ale. 

Interestingly, after I reviewed this ale, I checked out some of the reviews on the big beer reviewing sites just to see what other people were saying. This is not something I often do, because I trust my own opinions, but I was curious about this brewery I’d never even heard of. The reviews of this beer were sparse, but none was particularly complimentary. I’m not calling bullshit on any of those reviewers, nor claiming I know something they don’t (since I have little formal training and a lumbering palate at best). I just think it’s a good demonstration of the subjectivity of beer reviewing.

Rating: 8.5 out of 10.

Hook, Line & Citra I.P.A.

The Bitter Wife and I did a wild amount of planned beer tourism during a weekend in Ontario’s Prince Edward County, but our brief stop to the bottle shop at Lake on the Mountain Brewing Company was a total fluke. Because we don’t own a car, we were relishing having our rental for a weekend, so we decided to go for a Saturday afternoon drive and, on the side of the road, the Missus spotted a “brewery ahead” sign. Obviously, I pulled off an awkward u-turn and seconds later, we were faced with a plethora of choices at an utterly unexpected brewery. Given my much depleted purse (owing to the other three breweries we'd already visited, as well as wineries and a distillery) I forced myself to practice a little restraint and only picked up two 660mL bottles, a brown ale (see a later post) and Hook, Line & Citra I.P.A., a 5.5%, 75 IBU that featured a cute fishing scene on the label.

Brassy in colour, clear, and nestled under a fluffy off-white head, HL&C poured with a mild aroma that promised citrus elements. Less mild to the tongue, the beer had a blend of coppery and citrus flavours, giving way to a genuinely bitter back end.

 

I’ve written before about IPAs that clock in below 6%, so I won’t repeat myself here. However, despite the fact that it hurt the overall score, I’ll concede that the low-ish percentage was well offset by the rousing hops presence (both Citra and Columbus) that rattled sabres from start to finish. 75 IBUs might not seem like a lot, but framed inside a lower-than-usual alcohol package, the bitterness resonates with some serious bass. Following the review portion of my pint, I enjoyed the rest of the beer while grilling, and the result was an undeniable synergy.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10.

Timmermans Oude Gueuze

According to the label of the caged and corked 375mL bottles of Timmermans Oude Gueuze, Timmermans is the world’s oldest lambic brewery—established in 1702. They operate out of Itterbeek, Belgium.

 

Timmerman’s Oude Gueuze contains 6.7% alcohol. The bottle I purchased was brewed in 2015 but not bottled until 2018. And, something I’ve rarely seen, it had a best before statement that lists November 2037! That said, I chose to drink my bottle fresh rather than cellar it.

Vibrant orange, the Oude Gueuze poured with a loose eggshell head. It had a powerful aroma, with tart and funky yeast notes playing a dominant role. Wonderfully sour and a little briny, the flavour was reminiscent of unsweetened cranberry juice, with some beery elements by way of wheat and hops textures.

I vividly remember my first gueuze. It was illicitly acquired when I was a high school student, and I thought it was hilariously foul. The better part have two decades have seen both my palate and my sense of humour mature. I now perceive a gueuze as a flavourful yet delicate brew, with intense elements offset by subtle ones. Among the gueuzes I’ve tried, Timmermans Oude Gueuze ranks high—it has both funk and soul. It’s tart and tangy, but also nuanced. And at 6.7% alcohol, it’s not goofing around, either.

Rating: 8.5 out of 10.

Long Black

Long Black, from Picton’s 555 Brewing Co., is billed as “a deceivingly easy drinking black ale”. It’s brewed with Cherry Bomb Coffee, and clocks in at 4.5% and 55 IBUs.

My pint arrived looking black and opaque, with a thin cap of tan head. The beer had a profoundly coffee-soaked aroma on top of rich malt notes. The beer is quite bitter, owing more to coffee than to hops. As well, there is considerable representation of well-roasted hops, chocolate, and a streak of something sweet and floral. The copy on the tap list likened it to a hint of elderflower, which seems credible.

While I was sitting on the patio enjoying my pint, a guy at the table next to me was working on a flight and enthusiastically polished off all except Long Black, which he clearly did not enjoy. Given that I thought it was a pretty solid and enjoyable little ale, I can only conclude that this is a divisive offering. But if you’re in Prince Edward County and in the mood for a dark ale with some character, I’d say give it a spin.

Rating: 8.0 out of 10.

The Judge APA

While in Picton, the seat of Ontario’s Prince Edward County, the Bitter Wife and I made a stop at 555 Brewing Co., conveniently located almost directly across the street from our hotel. I tried a couple of different offerings while there, but the one I decided to write up was The Judge, 555’s 5.6% 45 IBU American Pale Ale. Brewed with local hops (from Pleasant Valley Hops), the beer was clear, gold, and topped with a sudsy white head.

The Jury had a dry and slightly floral citrus nose. Fairly easy-drinking, the APA was bright and citrusy, with a finish that balanced bitterness with biscuity malt.

A fine and enjoyable beer, The Jury isn’t a novel brew, but it tasted nice and kicked off my visit to 555 with aplomb. If I were in Picton again, id definitely revisit this perky little number.

Rating: 7.5 out of 10.

White’s Bay IPA

White’s Bay IPA is named in honour of a former fishing hole in Collingwood, Ontario. The 6.1%, 45 IBU beer is brewed by the Collingwood Brewery and comes in 473mL cans.

A golden-orange ale, WB pours with a cottony covering of loose white suds. It has a sticky aroma that blends notes of juicy fruit with a stab of piney astringency. While the nose waffles between pine and fruit, the flavour takes a more decisive stance, with floral, evergreen notes winning the day. The finish has done resinous notes, but lacks the gravitas I like in a woodsy hooped ale.

Both percentage and IBU level are on the low end of the spectrum for an IPA, neither of which is apt to win and plaudits from me. However, the flavour really is quite vibrant, particularly at the front end.

Rating: 7.5 out of 10.